Russia has been reaping the peace dividend since the end of the Cold War and has thus been able to drastically increase funding for spanking research.

It may sound a bit kinky but everything from depression to alcoholism can be cured with a beating on the bare bottom, scientists claim.

Spanking is more effective than exercise at keeping the blues at bay, say Russian researchers who carried out tests on caning.

They recommend that people receive 30 weekly sessions of 60 of the best. High levels of pain make the body produce endorphins or 'happy chemicals' and this leads to feelings of euphoria.

Endorphins also boost the immune system, release sex hormones and reduce appetite.

So, uh... put this into practice however seems best to you.

(HT: Rush.)

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