BFL sister Baldilocks has a great post on measuring up to Pat Tillman, and also points to a post by Aaron the Liberal Slayer about "get laid politics" and why men appease feminists (hint, it's in the title). They both point out that "feminism" isn't really about women, it's about women trying to be masculine.
Baldi (we're on a first-two-syllables-of-the-name basis) also points to an article by a minister in Florida named Doug Giles who wonders:
Have you ever asked yourself, “Self … why do churches today look more like the lingerie department at Wal-Mart, than a battalion of men poised to plunder the powers of darkness?” Why do men avoid going to church, and what can be done about it?He's got a lot of great suggestions, including:
- Enough with the Precious Moments prints and figurines -- okay? How about decking out the sanctuary with serious transcendent art work that stops us in our tracks, rather than ubiquitous prints of fat baby angels who look like they’ve got a good buzz going from too much Mountain Dew and children’s aspirin?Good stuff.- Lose the Church’s “I’m in therapy for ever” feel. Yes, yes, we’re all a work in progress but the co-dependant, extended womb the Church has wrongfully created has allowed congregants to not get a life because of some difficult doo-doo in their lives. Sure life’s hard, little Sally, and the sooner, we celebrate the struggle the quicker we will draw men back to our houses of worship.
(HT: Dean Esmay.)
First two syllables? I hope that DOESN'T mean Baldi calls you Master.
Lose the Church’s “I’m in therapy for ever” feel. Yes, yes, we’re all a work in progress but the co-dependant, extended womb the Church has wrongfully created has allowed congregants to not get a life because of some difficult doo-doo in their lives. Sure life’s hard, little Sally, and the sooner, we celebrate the struggle the quicker we will draw men back to our houses of worship.
Hear Hear! (or is that "here here!" - I never know).
I work in student ministry - the majority of the on-fire kids there are girls too. What's up with us guys?
J: Ahhh! Stop reading so much into things! Now I'll never get elected Senator.
B: I wish I knew.
I have an idea, but it isn't formulated very well. Maybe someone else can explain it better. Maybe men need outward actions to connect spiritually. I heard that is one reason why Jewish men are required to do so much outwardly, because that helps them really connect with their spirituality.
This idea may also be a cause for the man's role in purchasing an engagement ring and proposing. It's an outward sacrifice, an outward action that not only gives the woman some security that he "really means it", but also I believe it helps the man connect with the marriage idea better.
Maybe if the church had more for the men to *do*. Not just sitting and listening, not just ushering. If there were some outward requirement, even a ritual, I think it would help men connect.
Did anyone get what I was driving at here? Sorry it's so disjointed.
(And I'm a woman, if it wasn't too obvious already!)
LT
After reading the whole Doug Giles article, there were a few things that made me uncomfortable about it. The whole emphasis on hypermasculinity seems misplaced, to me. I am a church choir director, and although I'm not at all "effeminate", I am certainly not your typical male (at least, from his description). I don't care for sports at all (unless St. Louis is playing), and hanging around the testosterone-laden knuckle-dragging types he describes always makes me uncomfortable, kind of like I have to worry about who is going to 1) demean the manhood of the pansy musician, and 2) beat the ever-living crap out of him. Also, my dad is a pastor, and is more of an intellectual than anything (although he does watch some football). The idea that he is less of a pastor because he has a more intellectual bent is ridiculous and insulting.
I think that Giles is confusing "masculinity" with "manly virtues". "Masculinity", as it were, is completely socially constructed-- it is different for every society, and it also varies within our society from age to age. However, manly virtues (such as courage, loyalty, honor, truth, etc.) do not change. My belief is that if you preach the Gospel, people will come to hear it. If some men don't come, that's their choice... they'll have to account for it later.
LT: I think you're right. Just consider all the initiation rites men make for everything. It's important for churches to make opportunities for men (and women) to be useful. That's the whole point of the church. Men need to be needed.
JS: I think the point of the article was basically that unspiritual men are going to give you more of an opportunity to minister to them if they respect you and can relate to you. There's no question that a pastor who love football will have more of a connection with an "average" man than will a pastor who doesn't love football.
That's part of the reason why I push myself to be at least mildly interested in sports. I see it as a responsibility. Like Paul said, we should become all things to all people.
Justene: 'Master' is one thing. 'Massa' is another. ;-)
I've worked at my current job for 13 years, and except with a few times here and there, I've been the only female. There have been times when I've been appalled at how the wives of the guys act. My coworkers have explained that it's "the rules", and that they've ruined me for being a proper wife since I'm far too sympathetic to the male plight. Though they've also said I'm not a girl, I'm a "Denise".
(still looking for that Blake's 7 quote)
(I call her "Locks" [g])
A real man? Nelson Mandela.
A real wimp? P. W. Botha.