Threshold of Attraction

Yes, I think so. His motivations for asking her out -- and the effort to do so -- needn't be match by her interest. Her motivations are not proven up by her assenting to the date, she could just want to score some free chow or something.

Yes. The man must assume the risk of rejection; the woman has no such risk.

Whoops! Posted too soon. I should have continued thus: The risk of rejection persists at least beyond the first date, and probably beyond the second as well. The man has assumed the burden of the initiative, and is expected to "propel" matters until one of the two elects to end them.

The woman has no responsibility to the romance other than to assent or demur to the man's invitations. Whenever she feels she's "had enough," she can simply decline further engagements, often by the particularly agonizing method of not returning his calls.

Francis has the theoretical nailed pretty well. In real life the women are often the aggressor. Haven't experienced that yet? Just wait, you will.

I doubt I will, S3. I'm, ah, er, um, old.

The question's too simplistic.

I've known many men who ask even if they're only marginally attracted to a woman just because they're serial daters. On the other hand, I've asked women out who've accepted and then stood me up. I mean, stood a guy I know up.

Attraction has something to do with asking out or accepting an invitation, but the date's just an opportunity to examine the other to determine a true level of attraction. Building the "asking out" process into some end-all ritual is one way to limit the dating, especially if you're shy or not experienced with women.

Even if the woman is not the agressor, there is no reason to believe that the rejection-risk cannot transfer to the woman; this is obvious when taken in the context of a long term relationship, but can very well result after only one or two dates.

In terms of Michaels original question, I think the truest answer is "it depends on the person, and their motivations". Some men I know date whoever they can, for extra-curricular purposes. Some seem to hold standards that I think result from listening to their mother too much or owning no mirrors or being unable to smell their own breath. Conversly, I know women who end up going on one date with every slug who asks them out, and others who will not date anyone who does not ride up on a white horse.

I doubt I will, S3. I'm, ah, er, um, old.

Francis: Older than what? 80? Oh wait, I hear the ones down at the senior center are the most aggressive of all. ;-)

Mike: The aggressors are the ones that have found the white horse to be a dirty little donkey and its rider to have the rustiest set of armor and dullest sword. In other words, they've been there, done that, and got the tee shirt. Of course the knight in shining armor/white horse fantasy seems to be genetic as it keeps resurfacing even after repeated episodes of the rusty armor/dirty donkey scenario.

I haven't figured it out yet either...

since there has been no comment from Woman, i will. comment.

yes.

a Man can be the ugliest creature in the world, and somehow with one look, the Woman is left undone. this vexes me. and i love it.

Well, I'm not just talking about ugliness, there's more to attraction than that.

When a girl accepts a date, does it mean she's interested, or does it just mean she's bored? Of course, lots of guys ask girls out because they're bored, too.